Monday, February 9, 2009

Valentines Wind Up - Monday

It's now 12:30 am, so that means it's Monday.
Not just any Monday, mind you, the Monday before Valentine's Day.

In the past, this week has been enough to send me, on alternate years, into bouts of righteous indignation (which, as you know, can only be assuaged by liberal applications of chocolate), waves of resentment (ditto the chocolate prescription), puddles of self pity (cured by watching old movies and crying into a pillow - whilst eating chocolate) and, worst of all, that one miserable year when I scraped the bottom of the barrel, sent myself flowers and pretended to the world that they'd actually come from a man.

Pitiful, non?

As you might imagine, Valentine's Day is not my favorite time of year.

Please, don't get me wrong! I'm not being covetous here. I have never once wished anyone else into my shoes. Nor am I upset to see the wonderful relationships around me. I'm so pleased that there are those people in the world who have found someone to love. I wish them only the best, believe you me!

However, having the greeting card businesses and the flower businesses and the candy businesses all conspire together against me seems a tad bit unfair.

This week I've decided to post a bit each day to try to slowly draw out the venom (ouch, bad use of idiom). So I'll start with the worst, and hopefully by the time I hit Saturday I'll be smiling. (Although I fear I'll also be eating coma-inducing amounts of chocolate.)

Starting with the worst, then...

"Better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all."

Who in the heck said that, and were they out of their blinking gourd?!?
How incredibly wrong can you be?

I was quite happy in my innocent state, thank you very much.
I was even content in telling myself that all the love birds around me were self-deluded, and "love" did not exist per se, but was a happy fiction of the masses. (Sort of like believing 401K's are a good investment and that you can trust little brothers to hold your ice cream cone and not take a lick.)

Am I happy now that I've experienced love and lost it?
Umm... That would be a distinct NO.

What I wouldn't give for a spot of selective amnesia.
It would truly have been better never to have experienced love at all and remained blissfully ignorant.

So, the saying is poppycock and worse it sets people up for a fall.
Problem is, it's a popular axiom and everyone parrots it to the next generation.

Monday's Valentine's Wind Up resolution?
Stop the madness now! If we all promised to NEVER mention this idiotic idiom again perhaps it will shrivel up and die.

For anyone out there who shares my sentiments, I'm planning on a bit of innocent self delusion on Saturday and I invite you to join me. What would your perfect Valentine's Date be?
No, I'm not playing into their hands (retail businesses that is) because other than my chocolate purchase I won't be actually giving them any money. I'll be playing out this little scene only in my head. neener neener.

You too can play! Start your mental preparations now.